Victoria Dorimain

Balancing motherhood, a PhD, and a research career: the silent juggle and the constant quest for balance

Being a mother, a PhD student, and a working research professional is a constant act of juggling. Often, these different roles feel like glass balls and I am afraid to drop any of them. Each one is demanding on its own; together, they can feel overwhelming.

One of the greatest challenges is the emotional load, managing not just tasks, but also expectations, self-doubt, and the pressure to prove that none of the roles suffer. Academia often rewards output, productivity and performance, not resilience. Motherhood (parenthood) demands presence, not perfection. The tension between the two is real and rarely acknowledged.

Yet, this intersection can also be powerful. It teaches time management, prioritization, and empathy. It fuels research with lived experience and grounds theory in real-world relevance. Still, more support is needed: institutional flexibility, acceptance of non-linear research paths, and recognition that complexity doesn’t weaken professionalism rather enriches it.

It is important to remember that we can not do everything at the same level all the time. Priorities shift constantly. Some days we excel in one role more than another, and that’s okay. Managing it all means adapting with grace and self-compassion.

To fellow parent-scholars: you are not alone. This is hard, and you are doing beautifully, even when it doesn’t feel like it. Perfection doesn’t exist. We are human, doing our best through this chapter of life.

Stay honest. Stay grounded. Lead with your authentic self while keeping in mind your core values and motivation. This site is my space to share both the beauty, the messiness of this journey and what inspires me along the way.

With tired love,

Victoria 🙂